


i wish with all my heart

by heybinnie



Category: ASTRO (Band)
Genre: ...eventually, Angst with a Happy Ending, Gen, Please read these tags, Self-Esteem Issues, mentions of wanting to.....not live, wishing star au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-16
Updated: 2017-04-16
Packaged: 2018-10-19 17:53:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10645014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heybinnie/pseuds/heybinnie
Summary: be careful of what you wish for. it's not always that a wishing star gives you a second chance.





	i wish with all my heart

you can’t breathe. it’s dark and cold and quiet and you can’t breathe, no matter how hard you try to tell yourself to calm down. there’s a lump in your throat and a weight on your chest that doesn’t seem to go away. lying on your side is supposed to work, isn’t it? so why not now?

you curl in on yourself and pull your blankets over your head. your walls have seen too much, heard too much, and know too much about you; you’re embarrassed that you can’t get a grip on yourself even in the privacy of your own room. you choke back a sob and press a clammy palm against your heart. it  _hurts_. it feels like you’re suffocating, like the air is purposely out to strangle you, and you tumble to the floor in an attempt to kick off your sheets.

you scramble to your feet to throw the windows open and breathe the night air in. the cold wind kisses your skin quietly, tangling fingers in your hair and wrapping around your tired heart. it’s soothing; the town is asleep, dim lights scattered across the streets, and no one can see the tracks on your cheeks.

no one can see you.

_no one ever sees you._

your heart groans as it twists in your chest. you bury your face in your hands and cry to the moon, sniffling and gasping all over again.

“i–i’m–” you hiccup, glancing up at the moon. it’s a little blurry. “i don’t– i don’t  _know_ –”

you press the heels of your palms into your eyes and duck your head.

“i just– i don’t want this anymore,” you mumble into the night. “i wish– i wish… i never existed.”

you sniffle, feeling something lift from your shoulders at being able to finally say it out loud. you move your palms over your eyelids in small circles, gently massaging your tired, stinging eyes, before looking up tiredly at the moon. you blink the blurriness away slowly.

and– wait a minute– is it just you, or is that star twinkling?

you blink again.

is it– is it coming closer?

you stare at the star without blinking, ignoring the strain and sting, and realise belatedly that 1. yes, it  _is_  coming closer and 2. it’s heading  _straight for you at the speed of light._

you gasp when all you see is this yellow, sparkling ball hurdling right towards your window, and narrowly jump out of the way when it crashes to your wooden floor boards. there’s a rush of wind that runs through your room, making the curtains flutter violently, and then there’s a blinding, bright spark that lights everything up from wherever the hell it was on the floor. you turn your head and shield your eyes, squeezing them shut when you feel the ground shake beneath you.

then everything stills, and the light disappears.

you blink rapidly, heart pounding in your chest as you slowly push yourself up on shaky legs. you grip the edge of your desk behind you, and feel panic flood your mind when you hear a quiet groan somewhere at the foot of your bed.

and suddenly a man straightens up from the floor, standing straight and tall and calmly smoothing out the invisible wrinkles of his impeccable white suit. he has a white top hat on, and it hides his head and face as he bends down to pick something up, and your mind draws blanks when you see that it’s a wand.

then he pushes back his hat and folds his hands behind him, and you see a handsome man with jet black hair and a small smile looking at you. there are tiny silver stars scattered around the corners of his eyes that only served to make them stand out.

“good evening, my lady,” his deep voice says gently as he pulls off his top hat and bows. “my name is lee dongmin, and i am here because you have made a wish.”

your brain short-circuits for all of two seconds before you blurt out an intelligent “i what?”

he straightens out and smiles patiently at you, putting his hat back on. “you wished for something mere minutes ago, did you not?”

you blink, mind racing, and feel your heart twist again. you cast your eyes down in embarrassment and shame. “i might have,” you say quietly. “but you couldn’t have known that.”

“ah, but i do know, because you made a wish at the exact same moment the moon sent me down from the stars.”

you glance back at him warily, turning your chin in the slightest shake of a head, when he tips his hat once more.

“i am a wishing star, my lady,” he says softly. then he gives you this sad smile. “and i am here simply to grant you your wish.”

your breath catches in your throat. you only realise your nails are digging into your palms when the man moves his wand slightly, and suddenly there’s a warm glow engulfing your fist. you unfold your fingers to see the marks your nails made disappearing slowly from your skin.

“however,” he says, “i am afraid that i have some… difficulties with fulfilling your request.”

“why?” you breathe shakily. “you can’t do it?”

“i most definitely can. it is just that–” the man falters, casting his eyes down for a moment. “…i simply wished that you had asked for something nicer, my lady.”

your heart groans again. you feel the familiar lump in your throat and a tightness in your chest, and scowl when you feel your eyes sting. a glance tells you that your hands are shaking.

“if i may, my lady,” he says gently, and you look up to meet his kind eyes. “would you like to wish for something else?”

your heart skips. you look down at your hands, scattered with faint scars and marks, and blink when a drop of tear lands on your palm. you open your mouth to answer, to say what your heart is telling you not to say–

–when there’s another blinding brightness out of nowhere. you blink away the white spots in your vision when the light dims out, and look up to find another man dressed in white beside the first– _what was his name again?_ –but much more younger-looking, more timid and lean and lanky. he has no hat on, though you see little silver stars littering his brown hair and the wand he’s fiddling with in his hands.

he gives you a nervous glance before turning away when the first man sighs. “what is it, sanha?”

“you have to come back,” ‘sanha’ says softly. he reaches out to tug at the other’s sleeve.

“you broke a rule. he’s calling you back.”

**Author's Note:**

> something that happened on a night i didnt feel so good. im not too sure if this is a healthy outlet, but ive always wanted to see a wishing star and im not too sure how any of this makes sense so here we are
> 
> also on [tumblr](http://heybinnie.tumblr.com) :)


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